Saturday, 5 December 2009
15 Questions to Ask Yourself Before Getting into a Long Term Relationship
If you are or have been in a long term relationship, you would be well conversant with the pains and pleasures involved. There are moments of happiness interspersed with bouts of doubt and difference of opinions between you and your partner. It has been seen that the in first few months or may be even in the first few years the couple are blissfully happy. They are head over heels in love with each other and cannot find any flaw in their mate however hard they try.
When in a relationship, we badly try to rediscover ourselves. The questions like, “why we exist?”, “for whom do we exist?”, “does that person actually deserve me or do I deserve him/her?” keep gnawing at our existence. Also, the very thought of getting united with that person seems to cast us into perpetual tension and we spend sleepless nights trying to find an answer. The challenge before us is whether we would be able to put up with that person all are life or vice versa.
If you plan to be in a long term relationship, you need to do a good groundwork. It takes years to make a relationship work. At the very beginning, you should be clear about what you want from your partner and what you think you can do for him/her.
Take time and develop the optimum amount of trust that is required to make your relationship work. Compassion is another essential element which you need to feel for your partner, but that would take time. Thus, it’s important to spend quality time with that person.
The very thought of being with this same person all your life might frighten you but give yourself time to review things and then, decide accordingly. Given below are a few questions that you need to ask yourself before getting into a long term relationship.
1. Are you both compatible? Are you ready to adjust to his/her and mindset?
2. Does the person you plan to spend your life with acknowledge, appreciate and respect your dreams?
3. Are you willing to accept his/her family and whether they would be creating havoc or not?
4. Will you be disclosing to him/her your much coveted secrets?
5. Do you completely trust your mate?
6. Will he/she be smothering?
7. Will you be able to retain your individual identity even after marriage?
8. Would you be able to arise upon a joint consensus about how many kids you want?
9. Do you both have similar takes on how you would like to bring your child up and the disciplinary measures that you plan to adopt?
10. Will you be having separate bank accounts or a joint account?
11. How do you plan to manage your finances?
12. Who would be doing the housework?
13. Who would pay the bills?
14. Which one of you would be doing the grocery shopping and cooking?
15. Would you need to cut down on the time you spend with your close friends now?
If you are able to find an answer to these questions, sit down and plan out things with your partner and your relationship will automatically unfold in course of time and trace its path.
When in a relationship, we badly try to rediscover ourselves. The questions like, “why we exist?”, “for whom do we exist?”, “does that person actually deserve me or do I deserve him/her?” keep gnawing at our existence. Also, the very thought of getting united with that person seems to cast us into perpetual tension and we spend sleepless nights trying to find an answer. The challenge before us is whether we would be able to put up with that person all are life or vice versa.
If you plan to be in a long term relationship, you need to do a good groundwork. It takes years to make a relationship work. At the very beginning, you should be clear about what you want from your partner and what you think you can do for him/her.
Take time and develop the optimum amount of trust that is required to make your relationship work. Compassion is another essential element which you need to feel for your partner, but that would take time. Thus, it’s important to spend quality time with that person.
The very thought of being with this same person all your life might frighten you but give yourself time to review things and then, decide accordingly. Given below are a few questions that you need to ask yourself before getting into a long term relationship.
1. Are you both compatible? Are you ready to adjust to his/her and mindset?
2. Does the person you plan to spend your life with acknowledge, appreciate and respect your dreams?
3. Are you willing to accept his/her family and whether they would be creating havoc or not?
4. Will you be disclosing to him/her your much coveted secrets?
5. Do you completely trust your mate?
6. Will he/she be smothering?
7. Will you be able to retain your individual identity even after marriage?
8. Would you be able to arise upon a joint consensus about how many kids you want?
9. Do you both have similar takes on how you would like to bring your child up and the disciplinary measures that you plan to adopt?
10. Will you be having separate bank accounts or a joint account?
11. How do you plan to manage your finances?
12. Who would be doing the housework?
13. Who would pay the bills?
14. Which one of you would be doing the grocery shopping and cooking?
15. Would you need to cut down on the time you spend with your close friends now?
If you are able to find an answer to these questions, sit down and plan out things with your partner and your relationship will automatically unfold in course of time and trace its path.
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